Silly. . .I know. (forgive me)

Okay, I’m starting to feel a little better. I’m starting to feel the tension in my shoulders dissolve a little. I can start planning outings for the family again, and we are able to have guests over to the house now. . . (now that my son’s surgery is over)
So I am slowly starting to feel more…normal, I guess.
It helped to hear a similar story from Tara. She has a very nice blog of her own going that I find myself going to more often than not.
There is something extremely comforting to hear stories from others that have walked a similar path. I never really felt like that until now.
I was never really a “support group” kind of person. But maybe things are changing. Maybe I’m changing. . .

Now onto something lighter.
When was the last time you laughed. I mean really let it out?
Were you with your friends? Your spouse? Was it your children that cause you to feel childlike and silly again? Do you “allow” yourself to find humor in a multitude of everyday things?
I personally have a somewhat drier sense of humor than my husband. And you are more likely to get a grin out of me than a belly laugh, but it’s not impossible. My sweet husband has an easy laugh. One that makes you “shhh” him in the theatre. His laugh usually makes me laugh more than the movie itself.
But there is this one joke that gets me EVERY time.
I will warn you that you may not find the humor in it yourself, but I personally can not say the entire joke straight through. After a word or two I start giggling, then chuckling and before I know it, I’m on the ground crying. I do have a suspicion that this joke is elementary to say the least, but the people that I share it with end up laughing as well. I’m just not sure what at. . . the joke, or the adult lady rolling around on the ground gasping for air. . . you decide.

A three (hee hee) legged dog walks into (hhhheeee heee) *a small tear
Into (HAAA HAAAAA Ah….) ( HEEE HEEEEE) * multiple tears
A bar ( trying to compose myself by this point)
And says (HAAA HAAAaaa children coming in now to check on me)
“ I’m lookin for the man (heee heeeeeeeeeee) who shot (HAAAA HAAAAA) my (HAAA AHAAHHAAAA ect. ) Paw.”

*Wiping tears away
Ewww! That felt good.

It's over, but it's not. . .

I have not blogged recently because. . .
My son had open heart surgery and I was busy with that.
It was a surreal experience to say the least and I am still dealing with a few different emotions that come straggling in on occasion.
Apparently I was in some sort of denial because I never really dealt with the whole thing until after we were home from the week long hospital stay. He is well now, and that is what is most important.
I am amazed though, at the lack of sensitivity from those closest to us. Not all really, just a couple, but it’s like a terrible thorn in my side. I don’t know why I care so much. I can only assume that my anger has more to do with the big picture and I am somehow choosing to direct it all to this one area. . . hmmm. I wonder if I’ll sleep tonight.
To quote my offenders, “yes it’s over and yes he’s “healed” “ But I feel as though my own heart has a gaping wound. Almost like something died. Maybe it was my hope. My hope that we would somehow be “saved” this experience. . . . I wonder why I even care about that, now that it’s over. It’s like dreading the pain of child labor after you have already had the baby. What is wrong with me?

Knock, Knock...I KNOW you're in there!

Tell me what you think. . .
I’m tend to be overly concerned with people and their feelings. I try not to make others uncomfortable if it’s not necessary.
With that said, I am faced with a dilemma. I am trying to make friends with my neighbors as I have mentioned before and I am trying to find that balance between being respectful and being friendly and inviting. I want to encourage a friendship with one neighbor in particular but I don’t want to be the neighbor that others run away from. I don’t fag them down every time I see them in the front yard. I politely wave and go about my own business, but if they want to talk, I do that too.
I’m just not sure . . .Should I try once more before backing off? Or should I assume that if they wanted a closer relationship then they would be reaching out as well? Now, don’t get me wrong, they don’t slam the door in my face or anything. Infact they warmly invite me in and we (the lady of the house) sit and chat for a good amount of time and I would venture to say that it is an enjoyable event for both involved, but can I be sure?? I had invited her to join me at the last minute to a Christmas party and she sounded sincere when she regrettably declined (her child was having a Christmas performance that night). But have not heard from her since. I offered to loan her some baby gear when she had relatives in over the holidays, and she accepted, but I have not heard from her since. (Yes, she returned the borrowed items.) So do I leave the ball in her court or do I assume that with the holidays and all, that she’s just been busy? I don’t want to be pushy, but I know that she’s the type to need a little pushing- just a little.
And now I have two new neighbors. They just built their homes next door. I would like to take them a pie, like I have done the others, but now I’m starting to wonder what the hell I’m doing. . .
It’s starting to sound “freakish” to me. Am I a freak? Has being neighborly in this day and age become something frowned upon? If I was your neighbor, would you run?
People, please give me a little perspective here. . . and hurry up, cause the pie's in the oven.